I never talked about my journey with Yoga, and I rarely mentioned it on social media, but Yoga has had a profound influence on my healing and awakening. I recently started to talk about it with the people in my life simply because I was asked to write an essay during my yoga teacher training about my personal journey with yoga. I realised that Hatha Yoga was my initiation on a path that more than 25 years ago, I didn’t even know existed.
My journey with yoga started many years ago when I was still living in Italy. I was going through a difficult time back then. I know now that what was happening within me during that time was my soul trying to remind me who I am and where my path was leading me.
It was 1998 when yoga came into my life. I had just received a diagnosis of depression, anxiety (bipolar) and OCD…. And I Love to point out that I don’t suffer from any of those diagnoses anymore 😊 😊 😊
But at the time, I didn’t know or remember much about energy and how it works. I was practising meditation, and I felt completely detached from everything, but mainly from myself.
I was in a desperate search to understand what was happening to me and to find something that could help me heal. At the same time, I was trying to live a normal life. I was constantly moving, with the flow of my feminine energy rising and falling and rising again.
One day, I took the bus to the town next to mine and went to a book shop. I bought a book about yoga, and that was the beginning of my journey. I don’t recall the exact day I chose to embark on my yoga journey. It was an out-of-the-blue thought, but I remember that it was springtime and the weather was getting warmer.
I couldn’t find a yoga class close to where I lived. Yoga at the time was not as widespread as it is now. And so, one spring morning in 1998, I woke up early and started with my first two asanas: Tadasana and Vrikshasana. That was all I could manage at the time. I wouldn’t say I was hooked from the beginning. I wasn’t in the right space to be connected to anything. I was struggling, but something within was showing me the way. It took me about four years and the move from Italy to Ireland to guide me to a yoga class with a teacher and other students.
Today, I can say that yoga was my initiation into the world of spirituality, and I am on the path back to myself. From 1998 to 2019, I had an on-and-off relationship with yoga. It was a ritual I enjoyed practising in times of need. I also studied, learned and practised many different healing modalities and ancient approaches to healing to keep working on my healing. From 2017 through 2019, I was moving through another storm, and yoga came back into my life but in a different way, with a different energy. Then, in March of 2019, the Universe unusually came to my rescue, and while I was going back home from work, I was hit while crossing the road at a busy cross-light. The accident put me in a wheelchair for about three months, and I had two surgeries. It took me one year to recover. During that time, I felt incredibly blessed and loved. I never felt angry, I felt surrounded by a bobble of Love. When I started to walk again on my own, yoga called me back. I started to practice it every day, along with my physiotherapy exercises. I did some yoga classes in person with my teacher, and I noticed that something had shifted in my energy. In 2019, through my recovery, I rediscovered teachings that truly helped me get in touch with my body, mind and soul. I started to feel like I was following a road, and signs were scattered everywhere for me to follow. One night, I even dreamed about Baba Neem Karoli. He came into my dream, and He offered me food. Around the same time, I was also studying Japa meditation. One night, after a Japa meditation class, my teacher gave me a mala that was blessed in India in a temple dedicated to Lord Shiva (the first yogi). I took the mala home and placed it on my bedside table. During that autumn night, I woke up from a sudden sharp pain in my back. I woke up and found a bee dying inside my bed. The bee came out of nowhere and stung me on my back between my heart and solar plexus…. I truly felt Lord Shiva's presence and His Blessings. It was an initiation on a path I didn’t foresee coming, but there it was… And so, I kept following the signs and working with my body and energy with yoga, breathing and meditation. I don’t really know where yoga is going to lead me. I am walking this path as best as possible with my body, womb, and heart.
One important lesson I have learned in life is to surrender to the Divine within. When I feel something shifting, changing, releasing, and transforming, I don’t try to control it…. I simply surrender to the unknown, even when it’s scary because, in that fear, there is so much excitement and unmanifested energy ready to be shaped by Love.
I’ll be teaching Hatha Yoga from the end of this month, and if you feel called to work with me, I’ll open the circle to welcome you.
Much Love
Michela xo (Satya)
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